1、读后续写之动作描写简单有效的四个微技能本课目标u1.复习读后续写”三原则四步骤”u2.能够理解并使用固定句式进行动作描写u3.能够根据短文细节,合理选用动作描写撰写与原文相呼应的细节,提升续文合理度,与原文融洽度及语言优美度.快速完成优质续写文的策略探索续写规律:01原文一致原则内容要前后衔接，上下连贯语言表达风格一致。03曲折性原则故事情节应跌宕起伏，其中人物会遇到困难或问题，但最终能解决。02正能量原则故事内容一定要正能量，弘扬社会主义核心价值观。如迷路了但最终一定回到了家；失败了或遇到困难了，但最终一定成功了；吵架了但最后一定是言归于好,和睦相处；犯错了，最后一定会改过自新，重新做人；贼
2、逃了，最后一定是绳之以法等等。三原则四个步骤2.2.细读首句，构思框架仔细阅读所给两段的首句，结合正能量结尾，思考大致框架。1.1.读懂大意，理清脉络读所给的不完整故事，弄清大意和主题，理清故事的主要人物和事件。4.4.修改润色，整洁誊写思考再三，把修正润色后的续写整洁地写入答卷。3.3.增加细节，开始写作依据情节发展和常识，在确定的框架内，可按“所见/遇所想，所为所感”等构思具体细节。Characters:Who,Events:What(when,where,how,why)环境描写,语言描写,动作描写,情绪描写,心理描写,检查错误升级句式注意三个衔接读 后 续 写 高 考 真 题题号问题原
3、 因办 法体裁主题思想侧重点2021新高考双胞胎做早餐把厨房弄得一团糟给母亲惊喜,庆祝母亲节 their father appeared父亲助攻记叙文母亲节惊喜动作描写2020新高考Bernard如何赚钱帮助养家经济衰退John had an idea:做爆米花卖钱记叙文助人献爱心动作描写2020.07 浙江野熊来到营地前熊闻到面包大蒜气味tried known actions:.辣椒水直升飞机记叙文险境求生动作描写2020.01 浙江小宠物狗郁郁寡欢小主人上大学Mum had an idea:给它买个狗伴记叙文让宠物狗高兴起来心理描写2018.06 浙江农场游玩迷路小兔惊马？记叙文迷途脱困环
4、境描写2017.06 浙江骑行遇狼未知向路过轿车求助记叙文险境求生动作描写如何使动作描写更饱满？感知:结合语境,如何优化表达？1.Because of his lies,she looked at him.Because of his lies,she at him.2.With only twenty seconds left,I ran to the line.With only twenty seconds left,I to the line.3.With only two minutes left,he ate his meal.With only two minutes left.
5、He up his meal.4.She heard her mother say quietly as she walked down the hall,Dont wake your dad up.She heard her mother as she down the hall,Dont wake your dad up.glaredrush/dashed swallowed whisperedtiptoed general words（笼统词）concrete words(具体词）walk (蹑手蹑脚地走)run (猛冲)look (瞥见)(怒视)(凝视)say/talk(闲聊)(耳语)
6、cry（啜泣)eat (咬)（咀嚼)(吞下)tiptoedash/rush glance glarestare chatwhisper weep/sobbite swallowchewSkill 1：Choose Accurate Verbs 用精准动词代替笼统动词 start/begin decide cry remember tired see attract get down to doingmake up ones mindburst into tearskeep in mindworn outcatch sight ofappeal toSkill 2：Choose proper p
7、hrases用恰当短语代替普通动词拥抱 hug/embrace冲向前跳起来一把抱住思考：Which picture is more vivid?Skill 3：分解动作，形成动作链 Action chains把动作过程分解成一连串的动作，构造动作链，让你的动作描写既丰富又生动！一把抱住she dashed forward,jumped up and hugged the boy tightly.拥抱 hug冲向前跳起来Sentence pattern 1：Sb.谓语 A,谓语B and 谓语 C动作链描述一系列的动作。如果是同一个主语做了两个动作以上，可以用这样的结构,这可以进行大量的动作细节
8、描写，完整的交代过程。I put on my coat hurriedly,grabbed my bag and rushed to school this morning.我早上匆忙去上学。思考：匆忙上学前有哪些动作穿外套抓起书包冲去学校+=匆忙去上学put on my coatgrabbed my bagrushed to school动作链 结构1:A,B and C 动作1动作2主要动作-用谓语动词表示（时态）次要动作-用非谓语动词表示（主动且先发生,用havingdone）排了三个小时的队伍,他被告知票被卖完了.Having queued for 3 hours,he was tol
9、d that the tickets had been sold out.Sentence pattern 2:当出现两个动作，而前后两个动作逻辑主语一致时，非谓语(主动且完成:Havingdonesth),主+谓Blamed by his teacher and laughed at by everyone,he felt rather upset and depressed.动作1动作2主要动作-用谓语动词表示（时态）次要动作-用非谓语动词表示（被动形式done）受到老师的责难和大家的嘲笑，他感到相当的不安和沮丧。动作3Sentence pattern 3:当出现两个动作，而前后两个动作逻
10、辑主语一致时，非谓语(done被动),主+谓 The girl began blowing her whistle,trying to get others attention.动作1动作2主要动作-用谓语动词表示（时态）次要动作-用非谓语动词表示（主动用doing）女孩开始吹她的口哨，尝试去吸引其他人的注意力。Sentence pattern 4:当出现两个动作，而前后两个动作逻辑主语一致时，主+谓,非谓语(主动用doing)Encouraged by the teachers words,Li Hua raised his hand high,saying,“I volunteer.”En
11、couraged by the teachers words,Tom hesitated to raise his hand,whispering,“ignore me.”Sentence pattern:Done/Doing,句子主干,doing 句子主干,doing+doing心理肢体语言1.肢体2.面部3.心理4.语言把动作和面部表情，心理，语言等结合，形成动作面。Skill 4：构造动作面 Creating a whole picture他们站在空旷的路边，仰望着天空，心理感受着这份珍贵的宁静。动作面句型1:doing+句子主干+doingStanding beside the emp
12、ty road,they looked up to the sky,feeling the precious peace.肢体面部贝贝坐在泳池边，双臂低垂，眺望远方，思考自己是白熊猫还是黑熊猫。肢体肢体面部心理动作面句型2:with+逻辑主语+非谓.With his arms dropping,Beibei sat beside the pool,wondering whether he was white or black.SummaryHow to describe an action vividly?4.看到一辆车开过来，他猛烈地挥手，希望能搭车。3.被她的善良所感动，我决定把这份无私的
13、爱传递下去，将来帮助更多的人。1.他拦下出租车，拿着箱子跳上去，告诉司机去警察局。2.被母亲误解后，她跑回房间，哭得很伤心。Homework患有脑疾的小男孩David参加越野比赛，赛前他信心动摇想要放弃，“我“鼓励他积极面对困难，战胜自我，David接受了我的建议，尽管困难重重他依然勇敢地完成了比赛，赢得其了同学们的喝彩。(选自2022年高考全国1卷)请运用所学技巧续写故事：Thank you!4.看到一辆车开过来，他猛烈地挥手，希望能搭车。3.被她的善良所感动，我决定把这份无私的爱传递下去，将来帮助更多的人。1.他拦下出租车，拿着箱子跳上去，告诉司机去警察局。2.被母亲误解后，她跑回房间，哭
14、得很伤心。He stopped the taxi,jumped in with the suitcase and told the driver,“Go to the police station,please.”.Deeply moved by her kindness,I decided to pass on the selfless love,helpingmore people in the future.Seeing a car approaching,he waved violently,hoping to get a ride.Misunderstood by her mothe
15、r,she ran back to her room,crying sadly.阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。It was the day of the big cross-country run.Students from seven different primary schools in and around the small town were warming up and walking the route(路线)through thick evergreen forest.I looked around and finally spot
16、ted David,who was standing by himself off to the side by a fence.He was small for ten years old.His usual big toothy smile was absent today.I walked over and asked him why he wasnt with the other children.He hesitated and then said he had decided not to run.What was wrong?He had worked so hard for t
17、his event!I quickly searched the crowd for the schools coach and asked him what had happened.“I was afraid that kids from other schools would laugh at him”,he explained uncomfortably.“I gave him the choice to run or not,and let him decide”.I bit back my frustration(懊恼).I knew the coach meant wellhe
18、thought he was doing the right thing.After making sure that David could run if he wanted,I turned to find him coming towards me,his small body rocking from side to side as he swung his feet forward.2022年新高考I卷David had a brain disease which prevented him from walking or running like other children,bu
19、t at school his classmates thought of him as a regular kid.He always participated to the best of his ability in whatever they were doing.That was why none of the children thought it unusual that David had decided to join the cross-country team.It just took him longerthats all.David had not missed a
20、single practice,and although he always finished his run long after the other children,he did always finish.As a special education teacher at the school,I was familiar with the challenges David faced and was proud of his strong determination.注意：1.续写词数应为150左右;2.请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答.We sat down next to ea
21、ch other,but David wouldnt look at me._I watched as David moved up to the starting line with the other runners._患有脑疾的小男孩David参加越野比赛，赛前他信心动摇想要放弃，“我“鼓励他积极面对困难，战胜自我，David接受了我的建议，尽管困难重重他依然勇敢地完成了比赛，赢得其了同学们的喝彩。(选自2022年高考全国1卷)请运用所学技巧续写故事：Para 2：I watched as David moved to the starting line with the other r
22、unners.He_ and I _ _.He_.With a bang,every runner(跑得像箭一样快)_.He_._,he finished the running.As David,the last one,made it to the finishing line,(时间像静止了一样)_.Thunderous applause broke out,with the name David echoing again and again.turned his head around to look at me signaled to him with a thumbsup,feeling proud of himsmiled,took a deep breath and got ready for the race，eyes brimming with determination shot like an arrowran with all his strength,in spite of his abnormal stepsEventuallytime seemed to stand still
