1、返回目录 Old and New Module 6 返回目录 Section Writing描述今昔对比的电子邮件返回目录 写作技法指导佳作构建示例目录Contents 返回目录 写作技法指导描写今昔对比时要根据过去的情况和现在的事实组织材料。返回目录 一、基本结构1开头提出主题句(提出什么事情发生了变化)；2对过去情况的描述(用过去时态，主要是一般过去时)；3对现在情况的描述(用现在时态，主要是一般现在时)；4总结句。返回目录 二、增分佳句1描述以前的情况：It wasseveral years ago.When I wasyears old,it was2描述现在的情况：It change
2、sIt becomesCompared with it several years before,it is now返回目录 3表达希望：I believe thatI hope that返回目录 佳作构建示例题目要求假设你是某中学的学生李华，最近收到美国朋友 Joy的电子邮件。他在三年前参观过你校，听说你校现在变化很大，希望了解发生了哪些具体的变化。请你根据下表提示，给他回一封电子邮件。返回目录 三年前 一座教学楼，一个操场，学生 1 000 多人现在1.校园扩建：新建了一座教学楼和一座图书馆，教学楼内有音乐室、美术室、微机房等；2学生人数：增加到了 2 000 多人；3体育设施与音乐器材配
3、备齐全；4绿化了校园。返回目录 注意：1.词数 100 左右；2可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯；3开头和结尾已给出，但不计入总词数。参考词汇：体育设施 sports facilities 装备 equip返回目录 Dear Joy，I was pleased to hear from you and Im writing to tell you something about the changes in my school._Yours，Li Huafrom 返回目录 审题谋篇第一步：审题构思很关键一、审题1确定体裁：本文为描述今昔变化的_；2确定人称：本文的主要人称为_；3确定时态：主体时态
4、通常为_和_。说明文第一、三人称一般过去时一般现在时返回目录 二、构思第一部分：开头提出学校发生了变化。第二部分：详细描述今昔对比。第三部分：表达自己的祝愿。第二步：核心词汇想周全1_ 变化2_发生3_不再4_在使用changetake placeno longerin use返回目录 5_图书馆6_各种各样的7_杂志8_装备有9_设备10_乐器libraryall kinds ofmagazinebe equipped withfacilitymusical instrument返回目录 第三步：由词扩句雏形现1众所周知，在我们学校已经发生了巨大变化。(主谓结构；现在完成时)2它现在不再是三
5、年前的样子了。(主系表结构；what引导表语从句)We all know that great changes have taken place in myschool.It is no longer what it used to be three years ago.返回目录 3那时候仅有一个教学楼和一个操场。(there be 句型)4其中之一是一座新教学楼。(主系表结构)5在这座新教学楼中，有音乐教室、美术教室和计算机教室。(there be 句型)There was only one teaching building and a playgroundat that time.One
6、 of them is a new classroom building.There are rooms for music,art and computer teaching inthe new classroom building.返回目录 6另一个是图书馆，里面有各种各样的图书、报纸和杂志。(where 引导的非限制性定语从句)7除此之外，我的学校体育设备和乐器配备齐全。(被动语态；be equipped with)The other is the library,where there are all kinds of books,newspapers and magazines.Be
7、sides,my school is well equipped with sports facilitiesand musical instruments.返回目录 8我认为我的学校会变得越来越好，我希望你再次访问我的学校。(宾语从句；并列句)I believe my school will become better and better,and Ihope you will visit my school again.返回目录 第四步：句式升级造亮点1用 as 引导非限制性定语从句改写句 12用 when 引导的非限制性定语从句把句 2 和句 3 合并As is known to us,
8、great changes have taken place in myschool.It is no longer what it used to be three years ago,whenthere was only one teaching building and a playground.返回目录 3用“in which”引导的定语从句把句 4 和句 5 合并One of them is a new classroom building,in which thereare rooms for music,art and computer teaching.返回目录 第五步：过渡衔
9、接联成篇Dear Joy，I was pleased to hear from you and Im writing to tell yousomething about the changes in my school.返回目录 As is known to us,great changes have taken place in my school.It is no longer what it used to be three years ago,when there was only one teaching building and a playground.Now two new
10、buildings have been built and are in use.One of them is a new classroom building,in which there are rooms for music,art and computer teaching.The other is the library,where there are all kinds of books,newspapers and magazines.Besides,my school is well equipped with sports facilities and musical instruments.The number of students has also grown from 1,000 to 2,000.Whats more,we have planted a lot of trees and flowers in and around the school.返回目录 I believe my school will become better and better,and I hope you will visit my school again.Yours，Li Hua
