1、高考资源网（） 您身边的高考专家写作任务: 根据下面表格提供的数据,写一篇题目为Changes in Peoples Diets的短文(词数:120左右),要求:1. State the changes in peoples diets in the past five years.2. Give possible reasons for the changes.3. Draw your own conclusions.YearFood19861987198819891990grain49%47%46.5%45%45%milk10%11%11%12%13%Fruit & vegetable24
2、%22%20%20%17%meat17%20%22.5%23%25%分析:本写作任务由提纲和图表构成。提纲部分提供给我们的是文章的叙述要点,事实上就是文章结构,由此我们可以将作文分为三部分。第一部分,叙述过去五年中人们饮食的变化。这一情况从何处得知呢？通过分析图表的纵栏和横栏可知,不同食品种类随着时间变化在人们日常饮食中所占比例的变化。对这一变化的简单概述即是第一部分的内容。分析表格数据,我们发现从1986年到1990年这5年里人们的饮食结构发生了很大的变化,如牛奶、肉类这些高营养食品的消费逐年增加,而粮食的消费则减少了。第二部分,分析人们饮食结构发生变化的原因。人们饮食结构发生变化主要有两大
3、原因。第一,随着经济的发展,人们富裕了,能消费得起高营养的食物了；第二,人们开始追求更加科学更加健康的食物搭配。第三部分,按提纲的要求,这一段是写结论。分析该食物搭配,希望人们将来的饮食结构更科学,更合理。初稿:In the past five years there have been a few changes in peoples diets. People eat fewer grains, drink more milk, eat fewer fruits and vegetables and eat more meat. I think its because people hav
4、e more money to buy meat and milk. Meat and milk are more expensive than grains. Milk and meat are important to ones health, but if people eat too much rich food, some problems will occur.In conclusion, people should keep a balance in their diets. They should eat enough grains, fruits and vegetables
5、 too.教师点评:这篇习作初稿大体上遵循了提纲的要求,条理清楚,要点叙述基本到位,从文中也能看出作者的独立思考能力,但是文章仍然存在一些缺点。下面我们来一一分析有待改进的地方。(1) 开头第一句写得很好,总起全篇,点出表格反映的主要信息:过去五年里人们饮食发生的变化。紧接着第二句概述变化内容。这一句话写得缺乏技巧性,只是依次列举出每种食物人们消费情况的变化,没有体现出分析和对比。如果在叙述时,将增加的放在一起介绍,减少的放在一起介绍会使对表格内容的概括更有力度。如:They eat fewer grains, fruits and vegetables but more milk and m
6、eat today than in the past. (2) 第二段对原因的叙述虽然满足了提纲要求,但是原因陈述过于单薄,逻辑性也不强,没有说服力。成稿:In the past five years there have been many changes in peoples diets. People eat fewer grains, fruits and vegetables, and more milk and meat today than in the past.There are mainly two reasons for these changes. Firstly, w
7、ith the development of the economy people have more money to buy meat and milk, which they couldnt afford in the past. Secondly, with more and more people realizing that diet is very important to their health, they have begun to consume more things such as milk and meat.Milk and meat are important,
8、but they arent the only things people should eat. People should eat a balanced diet and try to consume different kinds of foods, especially grains, fruits and vegetables. Powerfulsentences:1. Fewer grains, fruits and vegetables are being consumed, while more milk and meat are being consumed today th
9、an in the past.2. A balanced diet is one that includes all the food groups. In other words, we should eat every kind of food every day. 3. Everyone wants to know how much they should eat to stay healthy. Its a tricky question, though. It depends on your age, whether youre a girl or a boy, and how ac
10、tive you are. 巩固练习:假设你在浏览一个美国中学生Paul的博客。他将自己一周的晚餐食谱贴在博客里,请根据他的食谱发一个帖子发表你的看法。(词数120-150) Mondayhamburger, fried chips, coke, ice creamTuesdaybeef, coke, chocolate cakeWednesdaychicken, strawberry cake, hot cocoaThursdaybeef, fried chips, coke, ice creamFridaychicken, cheese bread, hot cocoa 本期参考范文Eat
11、 HealthilyI saw a middle school students menu for supper on his blog. Most of his suppers included meat, fried food and desserts, and he drank lots of Coke. I dont think this is healthy food for a teenager. Eating too much high-calorie food such as fried chips, chocolate cake, cheese, ice cream and
12、meat in the evening makes it easy to gain weight. Moreover, there are no fruits or vegetables on the menu. Those are foods that can provide a growing body with vitamins and fiber. Coke is not a healthy drink. I have some ideas to make the menu a healthy one. I suggest that he change the menus of two of the days into beans and vegetable salad, and cut down the desserts. He should also stop drinking Coke and try some vegetable soup.
