1、523/524 The One In VegasScene: Monica and Rachels, Rachel is sitting in the living room and Phoebe is standing in the kitchen as the phone rings.Rachel: Pheebs? Could you get that? Please?Phoebe: Why? Just cause youre too lazy to get up off your touchie? Rachel: No! No! Its just that all the people
2、in the entire world that I want to talk to are right here.Phoebe: (smiles) Okay! (Goes to answer the phone.)Rachel: (under her breath) Sucker!Phoebe: (answering the phone) Hello? (Listens) Hey Joey!Cut to Las Vegas, Joey is on the phone and wearing his gladiator costume.Joey: Hey Pheebs! Listen, uh
3、can you do me a favor? I forgot the pin number to my ATM card can, can you get it for me?Phoebe: Sure! Where is it?Joey: Uh, I scratched it on the ATM machine down on the corner.Phoebe: Ohh! So youre 5639?!Joey: Thats it! Thanks Pheebs!Cut to Monica and RachelsChandler: (entering) Hey!Phoebe: (to Jo
4、ey) Ooh, do you want to talk to Chandler?Chandler: (To Phoebe) Is that Joey?! (She nods yes) Let me talk to him!Cut to JoeyJoey: No! (She nods no to Chandler) Because he didnt believe in my movie! Which is a big mistake because it is real! Real!A Casino Boss: Hey! Tribbiani! Get back to work! Break
5、times over!Cut to PhoebePhoebe: Who was that?Joey: Uhh, my stunt double. Yeah, and yknow, hes getting a little too familiar for my tastes.Chandler: (To Phoebe) Yknow what? I have been trying to apologize to him all week! If hes not gonna let me do it on the phone, Im gonna go down there and do it in
6、 person.Cut to JoeyJoey: Uhh Pheebs, I heard that. Can you put him on?Cut to PhoebePhoebe: Yeah! (She hands the phone to Chandler.)Chandler: (To Joey) Hey!Cut to JoeyJoey: Dont come out here!Cut to ChandlerChandler: No-no-no-no, Ive supported you one hundred percent and I want to prove that to you i
7、n person!Cut to JoeyJoey: I got that! I forgive ya! Dont come out here!Cut to ChandlerChandler: Forgive me? You havent been taking my calls in a week!Cut to JoeyJoey: Well, Im totally over it Chandler. Friends forever! Dont come out here!A Tourist: (To Joey) Would you mind doing a picture with us?Cu
8、t to ChandlerChandler: Uh, what was that?Cut to JoeyJoey: Uh, Entertainment Tonight. Cut to Chandler Yeah, okay so, good talking to ya and dont come out here. All right. (Hangs up the phone and poses for that picture.)Opening CreditsScene: Monica and Rachels, Phoebe is entering.Phoebe: Monica! Im so
9、rry Im late! (Starts looking around for her) Monica? (Goes into Monicas bedroom.)Monica: (entering) Phoebe? (Phoebe comes back into the living room) Oh, Phoebe, Im so sorry. Have you been here long?Phoebe: (saddened) Its okay. What the hell took you so long?Monica: Okay, you can not tell Chandler. O
10、kay? That I ran into Richard.Phoebe: Which Richard?Monica: The Richard.Phoebe: Richard Simmons?! Oh my God!Monica: Noo! My ex-boyfriend Richard! Yknow the tall guy, moustache? Phoebe: Oh! Okay, that actually makes more sense. So how was it?Monica: It was, it was really nice. We started talking and I
11、-I ended up having lunch with him.Phoebe: That is so weird! I had a dream that youd have lunch with Richard.Monica: Really?Phoebe: But again, Simmons. Go on.Monica: The strange part was, he was really nice, umm and he looks great, but I didnt feel anything at all!Phoebe: Ooh! So now why cant we tell
12、 Chandler?Monica: Because it would totally freak him out and tomorrows our anniversary. I just dont want anything to spoil that.Phoebe: Oh, I cant believe you guys lasted a whole year!Monica: I know.Phoebe: Wow! I owe Rachel 20 bucks!Monica: What?Phoebe: On a totally different bet.Chandler: (enterin
13、g) Hey!Monica: Its almost our anniversary!Chandler: I know. Can you believe it? One year ago today I was just your annoying friend Chandler.Phoebe: Awww! Now youre just my annoying friend Chandler.Chandler: Huh.Monica: I got you a present!Chandler: Oh, but its not til tomorrow!Monica: I know, but yo
14、u have to open it today! (Hands it too him.)Chandler: Okay.(He starts taking his time opening it. Finally Monica snaps.)Monica: (grabbing the gift from him and opening it) Okay! There you go! Its two tickets to Vegas!Chandler: Wow!Monica: For this weekend! Oh gosh, it would be perfect, we get to see
15、 Joey plus we get to start our anniversary celebration on the plane. We can call it out plane-aversary.Chandler: Do we have to?Monica: No.Chandler: Okay this is great, but Joey said he didnt want any of us out there.Monica: Oh, he just doesnt want us to go through any trouble. Think of how excited h
16、ell be when we go out and surprise him! Plus we get to have our own, ani-Vegas-ary! A-Nevadaversary!Chandler: Yeah, I think we should see other people.Monica: But we can go, right?Chandler: Yes.Monica: Okay!Chandler: Its a great idea. (They kiss)Phoebe: Okay, Im gonna go too!Chandler: Yknow Pheebs,
17、its kinda our (His and Monicas) anniversary.Phoebe: Oh please, you are not gonna ditch again like you did with London.Monica: Ditch you? Phoebe, you were pregnant with the triplets!Phoebe: Uh-huh, great story! Im going!Rachel: (entering with Ross) Hi!Phoebe: Hey!Ross: Hey!Phoebe: Hey, you guys, list
18、en, this weekend were all gonna go to Las Vegas to surprise Joey! Including me! You wanna go?!Rachel: Well, I guess I could take a couple days off work.Phoebe: Of course you can take a couple days off work because this trip includes me!Rachel: Oh no, wait a minute, wait, Ive got a presentation tomor
19、row. I cant miss that.Ross: Oh, but Ive got tickets to the Van Gogh exhibit! Ive been waiting like a year for this.Chandler: (coughing) Art lover!Ross: Whatd you say?Chandler: I said art lover.Ross: Is that supposed to be an insult?Chandler: I dont know, Im very tired. Ross: So Rach, maybe you and I
20、 could fly out together Saturday.Rachel: That sounds great.Ross: Yeah? All right Ill call the airlines. (Picks up the phone and does so)Rachel: Okay. Yeah, that would be nice actually, to have the apartment to myself for a night.Phoebe: Oh yeah, so you can walk around naked.Rachel: No! So I can be b
21、y myself. Yknow? Have a little alone time.Phoebe: Naked alone time.Rachel: No! Phoebe just because Im alone doesnt mean I wanna walk around naked. I mean, you live alone, you dont walk around naked.Phoebe: Uh-huh! Why do you think it takes me so long to answer the door?Scene: An airplane cabin, Phoe
22、be has the aisle seat, Chandler the window, and Monicas stuck in that horrible middle seat.Phoebe: So, so far is this trip to Vegas better or worse than the trip to London?Chandler: So its pretty much the same Pheebs.Phoebe: Okay, what about after I give you these candies? (Hands them each one from
23、her purse.)Chandler: Yeah, I guess its a little better now.Phoebe: Ah-ha! Okay, (takes out a notepad) Las Vegas 1, London 0! Ill be right back. (Gets up and heads aft.)Chandler: (To Monica) Happy plane-aversary.Monica: Aww! I love you!Chandler: Can I give you a present now?Monica: Okay!Chandler: Oka
24、y! (He grabs his carryon and starts rummaging through it.) Oh man! Dont tell me I did this!Monica: I love the I forgot the present fake out!Chandler: How do you feel about the, I really did forgot the present, please forgive me not fake out?Monica: Oh thats okay. Dont worry about it, you can give it
25、 to me when we get back.Chandler: Ohh thats the worse thing that can happen on an anniversary ever!Phoebe: (sitting down) Oh good! All right, so you decided to tell him about the Richard thing.Chandler: What-what Richard thing?Phoebe: Oh no. The patented version.Chandler: What Richard thing?Phoebe:
26、(To Monica under her breath) Simmons! Go with Simmons!Monica: Okay, I umm, I ran into Richard yesterday and he asked me if I wanted to go for a bite and I did. The only reason I didnt tell you is because I knew youd get mad and I didnt want to spoil our anniversary.Chandler: (talking out of the side
27、 of his mouth) Im not mad.Monica: Really?!Chandler: Oh yeah! Yeah, so you-you bumped into Richard! You grabbed a bite! Its no big deal. (He still aint happy.)Monica: Great!(Pause.)Phoebe: Okay, London 1Scene: Monica and Rachels, Rachel is coming out of the bathroom after a shower wearing only her ba
28、th robe, walks into the kitchen, and opens the fridge. As she bends over to grab a bottle of wine, her robe falls open (Damn this network primetime programming, we didnt see anything!) and she quickly closes it again. But then realizes she didnt have to do that. So she closes the fridge and stands n
29、ext to the table, thinks about it for a little while andRachel: (takes off her robe) Oh! Look what happened! Dont get your hopes up guys, we only get to see her from the back or from the neck up. Its times like these I wish that the networks would broadcast some nudity other than Denis Franzs butt.
30、(In her head.) Huh, check me out! Im in my kitchennaked! Im picking up an orange. (Does so) Im naked! (Goes into the living room) Lighting the candles, naked, and carefully. (She backs anything that might have a point like a candle on her body away.)Cut to Rosss apartment, hes sitting by his window
31、looking at an art book. As hes turning the page, he glances up and notices something.Ross: (in his head) Oh my God! Thats Rachel naked! I cant look at that! I am looking at this. (Looks back at his book.) Okay, vivid colors, expressive brush strokesUnless she wants me to be looking at that. She know
32、s Im home. She knows I can see her. What kind of game is she playing? I think maybe someones lonely tonight. Oh-ho, Dr. Geller! Stop it! Youre being silly! Or, am I?Cut back to Monica and Rachels apartment, Rachel is singing along with a song and dancing while facing the big picture window. Yknow, I
33、 think Id pay real good money to be on the other side of that window!Rachel: (singing) Love to love ya baby! Ow! Love to love ya baby! Ow! (Theres a knock on the door, she turns off the music, puts on her robe, and goes to answer the door.) Love to love ya, baby! (Theres another knock.) Darnit! (Loo
34、ks through the peephole and turns on the lights.) Ugh. (She opens the door to Ross whos leaning against the door jam.) Ross: Hey.Commercial BreakScene: Monica and Rachels, the scene is continued from where we left off before the break.Ross: May I come in?Rachel: Uh, yeah, if you want too.Ross: Do yo
35、u want me too?Rachel: Yeah, sure?Ross: So do I. (Slowly walks in.) Okay Rach, before anything happens (He takes off his coat) I just want to lay down a couple of ground rules. (Turns back to face her.) This is just about tonight. I dont to go through with this if its going to raise the question of U
36、s. (Rachels confused) Okay? I just want this to be (Kicks off his left shoe) about what it is! (Kicks off the other one.)Rachel: And um, what-what is that Ross?Ross: The physical act of love. (Hisses at her.)Rachel: (laughs) What?! Are you crazy?Ross: Oh so-so you werent trying to entice me just now
37、 with your-your nakedness?Rachel: (gasps) Oh God, you saw me?! Oh!Ross: You werent trying to entice me with your nakedness.Rachel: Noo! No! You thought, you actually thought I wanted to have sex with you?!Ross: No! No! (Grabs his coat) No! (Grabs a shoe.) No-no-no-no. (Grabs the other one and heads
38、for the door.)Rachel: Ohh wow! Im sorry, but Ross you kicked off your shoes!Ross: Can we, can we just forget this ever happened?Rachel: Yes of course, absolutely! Youre right. Im sorry.Ross: Thank you.Rachel: Yes.Ross: All right I guess Im, gonna go pack. (Starts to leave)Rachel: Okay. Oh wait! One
39、more thing umm, do-do we still need to uh settle the question of us?(Ross storms off embarrassed.)Scene: Las Vegas, we have the typical glamour shots of Vegas, the Strip, slot machines, a couple other gaming tables all set to the tune of you guessed it, Money. Anyhoo, we finally get through that and
40、 watch Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe enter Caesars Palace carrying their luggage.Phoebe: Hey you guys wait! Guys! (Catches up to them.) This place is so much better than London! Okay? This lady dressed like Cleopatra gave me a coupon, 99 cent steak and lobster dinner. Huh!Monica: Phoebe, you dont eat
41、 animals. Phoebe: For 99 cents, Id eat you. (Sees the casino) Okay, I can totally settle down here. Its got everything I could ever want, including Joey! Look! (Points to Joey in his gladiator suit posing for a picture with two old ladies.) Oh! Look! Hi!Chandler: Oh my God.Phoebe: Hey! Joey! (They a
42、ll head over to him, he spots them coming and panics.) Hey! Hey! Wow! (She hugs him.)Joey: Hi!Chandler: Love your condoms my man.Joey: What-what are you guys doing here? I thought I told you not to come.Phoebe: Why are you dressed as a gladiator?Joey: Uhh, because Im shooting a scene right now. Yeah
43、, I uh, I play a gladiator. Uh, yknow what? Hold-hold on a second. (To no one in particular) Can we cut? Yeah, my-my friends are here, Im gonna take a little break.Monica: Who are you talking too?Joey: They uh director. Uhh, her. (Points to an old woman standing behind him. Who glares at him and wal
44、ks off.) All right, all right, its not a gladiator movie. I work here.Chandler: Why?! What happened?!Joey: Well, the movie got shutdown because they ran out of money, so Im working here til it starts up again, if it ever does.Monica: Im so sorry.Joey: Look, Im sorry I didnt tell ya. (To Chandler) Im
45、 sorry man.Chandler: No-no, thats okay, apparently theres a new policy where we dont have to share everything with everybody.Monica: I knew you were not okay with that.Phoebe: So youre a gladiator! Wow!Joey: Yeah, what-whats going on?Phoebe: Monica had lunch with Richard.Joey: Dawson?! Phoebe: Noo!
46、But that wouldve been so cool!Chandler: No! Her boyfriend Richard!Monica: It meant nothing! Okay? After all this time, how can you not trust me?Chandler: When you go lunching with hunky moustache men and dont tell me about it!Monica: Youre right. Im sorry. I shouldve told you.Chandler: Thanks. (They
47、 hug.)Joey: Aww, there we go.Phoebe: I love Vegas!Monica: I promise you, next time I will absolutely tell you.Chandler: (pushing her away from another hug) Next time?Joey: Ooh, so close.Chandler: Theres not gonna be a next time! You can not ever see him again!Monica: I can not see him? I mean, you c
48、ant tell me what to do!Chandler: Thats so funny, because I think I just did!Monica: Oh yknow what? If youre gonna be acting like this all night, I really, I dont even want to be around you.Chandler: Fine with me!Monica: Fine! Happy Anniversary!Joey: Whoa! Whoa! Guys! Please! Come on! Come on! This i
49、s obviously just a big misunderstanding.Monica: No it is not!Chandler: What are you talkingJoey: Hey-hey dont look at me! I just work here! (Walks away.)Scene: An aircraft cabin, Ross and Rachel are on their way to Vegas.Rachel: (taking off her sweater) Okay umm, Ross? Im-Im really warm, so Im going
50、 to be taking off my sweater. Now, Im just letting you know that this is not an invitation to the physical act of love.Ross: (sarcastic) Yep! Thats hilarious!Rachel: Im sorry. Im done. Im done.Ross: Yknow, last night was embarrassing for you too.Rachel: No, not really. I mean youve seen me naked hun
51、dreds of times.Ross: Uh-huh. But it was a first for the rest of my building.Rachel: Okay. All right, thats true! But yknow I just dont embarrass that easily.Ross: What?! You totally get embarrassed!Rachel: No, I dont! Ross, I think Im just a more secure person than you are.Ross: Is that so?Rachel: Y
52、eah.(Pause.)Ross: (loudly so that everyone can hear) Hey lady! I dont care how much you want it! Okay?! I am not gonna to have sex with you in the bathroom! (Rachel sinks lower on her chair trying to hide.)Scene: Chandlers hotel room, hes sitting there with Joey whos talking about his helmet and run
53、ning his hand through that feathery thing at the top.Joey: Hey, yknow in Roman times this was more than just a hat.Chandler: Really?Joey: Yeah, sure! Sure! They would uh, they would scrub the floors with it! They would use it to get the mud off their shoe. And sometimes underneath the horse would ge
54、t dirty so they would stick it rightChandler: (interrupting in the nick of time) Joey, I uh! I cant believe this is how Im spending my anniversary.Joey: All right well, Ill take you someplace nice then. Look! A guy tipped me a hundred bucks today.Chandler: Whoa!Joey: Yeah-yeah, he was playing blackj
55、ack for like an hour and he won $5,000. Can you believe that? $5,000!Chandler: Yknow, if I won $5,000 Id join a gym, yknow build up my upper body and hit Richard from behind with a stick! (Mimics it.)Joey: Wait a minute! Why dont I do what that guy did? Ill take this $100 and turn it into $5,000! An
56、d then Ill turn that into enough money to get my movie going again!Chandler: Good luck! Joey: Chandler! I dont need luck. I have thought this through!Chandler: I see.(Joey exits as Chandler shakes his head.)Commercial BreakScene: The casino bar, Phoebe and Monica are sitting at the bar, while Wayne
57、Newtons signature song Danke Schoen is playing in the background.Monica: (to the bartender) Thank you.Phoebe: Thanks.Monica: I cant believe this! This is like the worst night ever!Phoebe: Yknow Monica you had a minor setback in your relationship with Chandler. Big deal! Its only Chandler. (Monica tu
58、rns and stares at her.) I am so sorry.Monica: This is crazy! I mean, its such a stupid argument. I dont even wanna see Richard again.Phoebe: So go fix it! Go find Chandler! Hes probably up in your room! Tell him that youre sorry and that you love him.Monica: Yknow what? Youre right Phoebe. Youre rig
59、ht. Thank you! (Gets up to find Chandler.)Phoebe: Sure! (When Monica gets close to the door.) (Yelling) Yeah! Las Vegas, number one!Cut to the casino, Monica is walking through it past the craps table when she notices a chip on the floor. She picks it up and heads to the table.Monica: Anybody lose t
60、his? (Holds up the chip and the woman next to her shakes her head no.)The Croupier: Comin out. Place your bet. (Monica does so.) Dice are out. (The woman next to Monica rolls the dice.) Double or nothin! Pay the front line! (Monica won and doubled the chip.)Monica: Hmm.Scene: An airplane cabin, Ross
61、 and Rachel are both reading as a guy stops by their row.Guy: (To Rachel) So uh, Im on my way back to the bathroom. (Ross giggles.)Rachel: Yeah, all right. All right! Just keep walkin! All right?(Ross keeps giggling and Rachel decides upon revenge. She gets up and kisses the rather large man in the
62、seat in front of Ross on the back of his head. The guy turns around angrily.)Rachel: Ross! What are you Im sorry sir. I just, I think he just really likes you.Time lapse, Ross is drinking something and decides to get Rachel again.Ross: (to the guy in the window seat next to him) Hey! Yknow that teac
63、her who had a baby with her student? (He points at Rachel.)Time lapse, Rachel pushes the flight attendant call button, takes Rosss drink, and spills it into his lap.Ross: What the? WhatRachel: (to the flight attendant who appears in record time. It was only seconds after Rachel pushed the call butto
64、n was she there. Once again, more proof that TV isnt real, IRL she wouldve been waiting for the rest of the flight and by then Rosss pants would be dry.) Hi! The Flight Attendant: Miss? May I help you?Rachel: Yes, Im sorry. Do you have any extra pants? Umm, my friend seems to have had a little accid
65、ent.Scene: Caesars Palace Casino, Joey is approaching one of the blackjack tables on his quest to make enough money for his movie.Joey: (to the dealer) Can I change a hundred? (He hands him his chip.)Blackjack Dealer: Changing one hundred! (Gives him the change.) Good luck sir.Joey: (betting all 100
66、) Lets ride.Blackjack Dealer: (Deals the cards) 13.Joey: Hit me! (He does so.) Ohh man! (Joey busts and loses all the money, but when the dealer starts to collect the cards Joey notices something.) Wait! (He holds his hand next to the dealers hand.)Cut to Chandlers room, Joey is relaying to Chandler
67、 his amazing discovery.Joey: Chandler! You are not gonna believe this! I have found my identical hand twin!Chandler: (totally confused) What?Joey: My identical hand twin!Chandler: Whats an identical hand twin?Joey: Whats it sound like? Its a guy with my identical hands! It was incredible! Chandler,
68、the dealers hands were exactly like me! It-it was like looking at my hands in a mirror!Chandler: Are you sure you werent (pause) looking at your hands in a mirror?Joey: Dont you see what this means?! I can forget about that stupid movie. Im gonna be a millionaire!Chandler: (totally confused) How?Joe
69、y: Look, I dont have it all worked out yet, but its gotta mean big money! Come on! Identical hands!Chandler: Again I must go back to, how?Joey: This is Vegas man! People will pay to see freaky stuff! Okay, how much would you pay to see this hand (Holds up his left hand) twice? Huh?Chandler: (Pause)
70、Yknow, I-I cant really put a price on that Joe.Joey: Hey, are you unsupporting me again?Chandler: No! No! I support you 100%! I just didnt, I didnt get it right away. Yknow now Im caught up! Identical hand twins! Its a million-dollar idea!(Joey starts to leave to embark on his genius moneymaking sch
71、eme, but is freaked out slightly when as he goes to open the door, theres a mysterious knock. He calms himself down and opens the door to reveal Phoebe.)Phoebe: Hey!Joey: Pheebs!Phoebe: Yeah?Joey: I found my identical hand twin!Phoebe: Ohh, you are so lucky! (To Chandler) Hey! So, wheres Monica? Did
72、 you guys make up?Chandler: No!Phoebe: But she just came up here!Chandler: That was Joey!Phoebe: I wonder where she is. That is so weird.Chandler: Yeah, well, shes probably talking to Richard.Phoebe: Would you stop that! Do you wanna know the first thing she said when she came back from her lunch wi
73、th Richard? She didnt feel anything for him. She loves you!Chandler: Really?Phoebe: Yes! Now, she feels terrible! She really wants to make up! You gotta find her.Chandler: Okay. (He gets up and goes to find her.)Phoebe: Good. (After he leaves, she puts on Joeys gladiator helmet and checks herself ou
74、t in the mirror) I should really start wearing hats!Scene: Caesars Palace Casino, Chandler is looking for Monica while Tom Joness signature song is playing in the background (Getting the theme yet? Tom Jones, Wayne Newton, casinos Theyre in Vegas people! Catch up!) Its Not Unusual, yknow, Its not un
75、usual to be loved by anyone! Its not unusual to have fun with anyone! But when I see you hanging about with anyone, its not unusual to see me cry! I wanna die. Well, while thats playing he spots Monica playing craps and in victory hug the guy next to her. Chandler turns and walks out.Scene: That sam
76、e plane cabin, Ross is working on a crossword puzzle and Rachel is asleep against his shoulder. She shifts a little bit and Ross suddenly gets an idea. An evil idea when he looks at his pen. Then we have a little time lapse, the plane has landed and everyone is disembarking. The flight attendant is
77、saying bye-bye to everyone.The Flight Attendant: (to another passenger) Welcome to Las Vegas.(Rachel approaches and we see the fruits of Rosss evil plan. He has drawn a moustache and beard on Rachel. The flight attendant just ignores it.)The Flight Attendant: (To Rachel) Thank you! (Not sure of hers
78、elf) Enjoy your flight?Rachel: Yes, I did. Thank you very much, it was excellent. (Disembarks)The Flight Attendant: (To Ross) Hope you had a nice flight.Ross: Ohh, it was the best!Commercial BreakScene: The casino, Ross and Rachel are entering.Ross: I think the check in is that way. (Points)Rachel:
79、Ahh.(A young boy sees Rachel, points, and starts laughing.)Rachel: Hello! (She makes a face and the kid laughs harder. Finally, his parents drag him off.) Ohh, kids love me.Phoebe: (sees Ross and Rachel) Hey!Ross: Phoebe! (They hug.) Phoebe: You guys are here! Yay!Rachel: Hi! (Hugs Phoebe)Phoebe: (s
80、ees Rachels face) What? Did you go to a costume party? Let me guess umm Pancho Vila? (Points at Rachel) and youre Bob Saget. (An old lady has sat down at the slot machine Phoebe was just at.)Rachel: Pancho Vila?Phoebe: Yeah! (Motions to her face, indicating all of Rachels make-up.)Rachel: What are y
81、ou talking about Pheebs? (Takes out her compact) I dont (She gasps when she looks in the mirror and sees her face.) (To Ross) Oh my God, you drew on me?!Ross: Hey, you wet my pants!Phoebe: Whoa, what kind of party was this?Rachel: Ross, I have been walking around like this since the plane! I canyou
82、have so crossed a line. (Heads for the bathroom)Ross: Rach! Wait! The mens room is that way. (Points in the other direction. Rachel hits him with her purse and heads for the ladies room.)(The old lady at Phoebes machine wins. Phoebe turns around in shock.)Phoebe: Ugh!Ross: What?Phoebe: Thats like th
83、e third time that ladys won on a machine I was playing.Ross: Oooohhh, Ill bet shes one of those people.Phoebe: M-M-Mole people?Ross: What? No-no, a lurker.Phoebe: Oh. Whats a lurker?Ross: Okay when youre playing a machine and it hasnt paid out, a lurker waits for you to give up and thenPhoebe: Kills
84、 you?Ross: No. They swoop in and steal your jackpot.Phoebe: Ohhh!Ross: Uh-hmm.Phoebe: How do you know about this?Ross: My nana used to do it. Thats how she paid for all my dancekarate lessons.Phoebe: Dance karate?Ross: Yes, its a deadly but beautiful sport. (Does a karate chop, then does a little da
85、nce-type sway.)Rachel: (returning with her purse covering her face) All right, it wont come off!Ross: What?!Rachel: It wont come off!Ross: Oh my God! Rach-Rach, are-are-are you sure?Rachel: No, actually I took it off then I drew it back on.Joey: (entering) Hey-hey-hey you made it!Ross: Joey!Joey: Al
86、l right! Hey-hey!Rachel: Hi!Joey: Whos your friend? Hes hot! (Ross laughs and Rachel smacks him with her purse.)Ross: (To Joey) Thanks man.Rachel: Hi. (She hugs Joey.)Ross: Hey listen I uh, talked to Chandler, sorry about the movie.Joey: No, dont be sorry. I dont need it anymore. I found my identica
87、l hand twin!Ross: Your what?Joey: My identical hand twin! The person whose hands are exactly like mine! This thing is a gold mine!Ross: What?! Thats not gonna make you any money!Joey: Okay. Well, if thats how you feel about it, fine! None of you get to live with me in my great big hand-shaped mansio
88、n! Except uh, you Pheebs. You can live in the thumb.Scene: The craps table, Monica is on a big roll.Monica: All right baby, come on! (Rolls the dice) Yes! Yes! I am on fire!Chandler: (walking by with his luggage) See you later Mon.Monica: Wait Chandler, what are you doing?!Chandler: What does it loo
89、k like? Im going home.Monica: What? Wait! Why? (He turns and heads for the door and she chases after him.) Chandler! Chandler! Wait! Im sorry, I was just playing for one second! I was trying to find you to tell you that, look if you dont want me to see Richard again, I wont! He means nothing to me!C
90、handler: Come on! I was there! (Hes propped up with his hand on a statute of a naked guy. He winces and pulls his hand away.) I know hes the love of your life.Monica: Not any more.Chandler: Really?!Monica: Really! (They hug and kiss) All right? Lets forget about this going home stuff and celebrate o
91、ur anniversary. (She picks up his suitcase.) Okay, this is empty.Chandler: Yeah, I wanted to make a dramatic scene, but I hate packing.Scene: A blackjack table, its the same one Joeys hand twin was working at, only hes not there anymore and has been replaced by a beautiful woman.Joey: (entering) Uhh
92、, hey. Wheres the other guy?The Woman Dealer: Which guy?Joey: Hes kinda tall, dark hair, hand looks exactly like this. (Holds up his hand.) See?The Woman Dealer: I dont know about the hands, but the guy that was here before me just went to the bathroom.Joey: Okay! (Walks away, then turns back.) How
93、you doin?The Woman Dealer: Very busy.Joey: Right! Okay. (Heads for the bathroom.)Scene: Ross and Rachels hotel room, Rachel is still trying to get the ink off and Ross is on the phone to the company. Wait a minute, why exactly are they sharing a hotel room? Didnt they like break-up or something? Did
94、 I miss a memo? Or maybe, its just foreshadowing things to come. Who knows? Maybe the answers at the bottom of the page. Then again, maybe it isnt and its just one of those things TV writers just dont explain. AnyhooRoss: (on the phone) Yes, hello. I have a question. Umm, I used your pen to draw on
95、my friends face. (Listens) A beard and a moustache. (Listens and laughs) Thank you. (Rachel turns around and glares at him.) No, she didnt think so. (Listens) I know its like (turns and sees Rachel staring at him and quickly changes the subject) anyway, umm well make-up didnt cover it and weve tried
96、 everything to get it off and nothings worked. What-what do we do? (Listens) Yeah. (Listens) Uh-huh. (Listens) Yeah. (Listens) Oh! Okay. (Listens) Okay, thank you! (Rachel gets excited at his tone.) (Hangs up the phone) Yeah, its not coming off.Rachel: What?! What else did he say?Ross: Umm, he said
97、he thought I was funny. So(Rachel stares at him.) Okay, look-look umm, lets just go downstairs, well have some fun, and you will forget all about it.Rachel: Ross, no! There is no way I am leaving this room looking like this!Ross: Oh, come on! Rach, its-its not that bad.Rachel: Ross, I am a human doo
98、dle!Ross: Look, just because some idiot drew on your face doesnt mean you shouldnt have any fun! Okay? And besides, hey-hey-hey no one is even gonna look at you. Okay? This is Vegas! Hello! There are tons of other freaks here! (Rachel turns around and glares at him.) There are tonsoffreaks here. No
99、other. No. Come on! No one will notice, I swear!(They both exit.)Time lapse, theyre both entering.Ross: Okay, there was some staring and pointing.Rachel: Okay, I need a, I need a drink! (Makes a beeline for the mini-bar.)Ross: Oh, hey yknow, they-they really overcharge you for that stuff. (Rachel gl
100、ares at him.) But who cares?! Because its all on me! (Rachel reaches into the fridge and pulls out two handfuls of those mini booze bottles.) (Watching her.) That is, one big drink! Rachel: (shes finished reliving the fridge of its entire alcohol content.) Macadamia nut?Ross: (looking at the price l
101、ist) Umm Wow! Thats-thats some pricey nut!Rachel: Hm-mmm! (Opens the container)Ross: Really like those Macadamia nuts, huh?Rachel: Nope! (She puts one in her mouth and spits it out, then does it again in another direction.)Scene: The casino, Phoebe is playing on a slot machine. Suddenly the lurker s
102、ticks her head around the aisle of slot machines.Phoebe: (seeing her) Get out of here you lurker! (She doesnt move) Go on! Get! (She throws a quarter at her.)Chandler: (arm-in-arm with Monica) Hey Pheebs!Phoebe: Ohh! You made up!Monica: Yeah, I couldnt be mad at him for too long.Chandler: Yeah, she
103、couldnt live without the Chan Love. (They start kissing.)Phoebe: Ohh, get a room.Monica: We have one.Phoebe: I know. Use it.Scene: The Mens room, Joey is entering and sees his hand twin washing his hands.Joey: Oh-oh-oh, yeah! (He grabs some towels and takes them to him.) Thats right, you take good c
104、are of those babies!Joeys Hand Twin: Excuse me?Joey: Its me, Joey!Joeys Hand Twin: Do I know you?Joey: (holds up his hand) Joey!Joeys Hand Twin: Oh-ho, yeah. Yeah, the hand guy.Joey: Okay, so what are we going to do about this hand twin thing?!Joeys Hand Twin: Nothing?Joey: Look, you and I have been
105、 given a gift. Okay? We have to do something with it. Like-like, hand modeling! Huh? Or-or magic! And you know NASAs gonna wanna talk to us!Joeys Hand Twin: (tries to leave) I have to get back toJoey: (stopping him) Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa-whoa! We could have our own show! Yknow we could clap our han
106、ds together people will love it! Huh? And-and-and I wrote a song for us! (Singing, to the tune of This Land is Your Land) This hand is your hand! This hand is my hand! Oh wait, thats your hand! No wait, its my hand!Joeys Hand Twin: Thats okay. (Walks out.)Joey: (following him) But you havent even he
107、ard the chorus!Scene: Ross and Rachels room, Ross is drinking a beer while Rachel is examining herself in the mirror.Rachel: Oh my God, Im starting to look like my great aunt, Muriel.Ross: (gets up) All right. Yknow what? We dont have to go downstairs! We can bring Vegas up to us! (He grabs a deck o
108、f cards and pulls up a chair.) All right, come on, come on, well play some blackjack. Here we go. (Deals the cards.) 13.Rachel: Hit me!Ross: (does so) Oohh, 23. (Rachel looks at him.) Which is what we play to at this casino! You win 10 dollars! (Holds out a ten.)Rachel: I bet 20.Ross: Youre right! (
109、Gives her the twenty she won.)Scene: The Craps Table, Monica is still on her roll, only this time Chandlers with her and she has a huge crowd of people around.Monica: (shaking the dice) A new pair of shoes for the Chan-Chan man! (Rolls the dice.) Yes! Chandler: Yes! Ive-Ive never seen a roll like th
110、is in my life!Monica: Thats right baby! Okay, what do I want now?Chandler: Okay, ah umm, ah, a 8. Ah, a 6?Monica: Pick a number! That is your only job!Chandler: 8. 8!Monica: Thank you!Chandler: If you get this one, we buy everybody here a steak dinner!All: Yay!The Croupier: 8!Monica: Yes!All: Yay!Mo
111、nica: (To Chandler) Were not really gonna buy these people steak dinners are we?Chandler: Noo!Monica: Okay, good! Okay, what do I want now?Chandler: Ahh, ooh, try a hard 8.Monica: What?Chandler: Two fours.Monica: Okay. (Rolls the dice) The Croupier: 8!: A Drunken Gambler: (To Chandler) Dont you let
112、her go! Youre a lucky guy!Chandler: Thank you, Mister Drunken Gambler! Okay, you get this and uh, we get the biggest suite in the place! (Everyone cheers) Wait-wait-wait-wait! We (motions to Monica and him.) get the biggest suite in the place.Monica: All right, biggest suite in the place. Come on! (
113、Rolls the dice.)Chandler: (sees the roll) Yes! I love you! I cant even remember what we were fighting about!Monica: Oh, thats because I had lunch with RichMe neither! Okay, what do I want now?Chandler: Another hard 8.Monica: Hard 8?! We should call it easy 8!Chandler: Okay, okay, I tell you what. Yo
114、u roll another hard eight; (pause) and we get married here tonight.Drunken Gambler: Go! Come on! Roll!All: Roll-roll!Monica: Shut up! It just got interesting!Commercial BreakScene: The Craps table, continued from earlier.Monica: What did you just say?Chandler: You roll another hard eight and we get
115、married here tonight.Monica: Are you serious?!Chandler: Yes! I love you! Ive never loved anybody as much as I love you.Monica: Ive never loved anybody as much as I love you.Chandler: Okay, so if an eight comes up, we take it as a sign and we do it! Whoa! Where have I heard that before? Matthew Perry
116、 talking about signs in Las Vegas. I guess it mustve been some movie I saw. What do you say?Monica: Okay!Chandler: Okay! Come on! Lets go! All right!(She rolls the dice, but one bounces out of the table.)Chandler: (spots one) Okay! Thats a four! And where-wheres the other one?Drunken Gambler: It wen
117、t under the table.Monica: Nobody move! (To Chandler) Okay, you look that way; Ill look this way!Chandler: All right! (He searches to his right; she searches to her left. Theyre both on their hands and knees when they spot the die. Its propped up against the table leg, and its not lying flat. Both th
118、e four and the five are showing.)Chandler: Here it is! Here it is!Monica: That could be a four or a five. Its your call.(Pause.)Chandler: Its a four.Monica: I think so too.(Cue up the music as they move in and kiss. This time I think its Perry Como, but Im not sure. Its Everybody loves somebody, som
119、etime! Everybody falls in love somehow! Something in your kiss, just told me, my sometime, is now!)Scene: The slot machines, Phoebe is still feeding quarters into the one-armed bandit as the lurker peeks over the top of the machines.Phoebe: Oh well, lost again. (She gets up and slowly moves away. Th
120、e lurker scurries in and takes her spot, only this time Phoebe set a trap for her and catches her in the act.) Thats it! You and me, outside!The Lurker: I dont want to see you lose a chunk of that pretty blond hair!(They start smacking each others cups, but Phoebe notices a security guard approachin
121、g.)Phoebe: Be cool! (They both pretend to have a nice conversation as the guard walks by, but after he leaves they both start fighting again.) Okay lady, your lurking days are over!The Lurker: What?!Phoebe: Yeah, from now on everyone you lurk, Im gonna lurk first! You move on to someone else, Im gon
122、na be one step ahead of you, every single time! And then Ill be on your ass every hour of every day til Monday, because thats when I go home. When do you leave?The Lurker: Also Monday.Phoebe: What time? Maybe we can share a cab!Scene: Ross and Rachels room, theyve pretty much consumed the entire min
123、i-bar. Needless to say, theyre feeling no pain and are still playing blackjack.Rachel: Hit me. (He does so.) Hit me. (He does so.) Hit me. (He does so.) Hit me. (He does so.) Hit me. (He does so.) Hit me. (He does so.) Hit me. (She slows down with each one.)Ross: (runs out of cards) We need more car
124、ds.Rachel: Yeah, and also we need more umm, drinks. Hold on a second. (Gets up but stumbles a little bit.) Whup, okay. (She makes it to the phone and picks it up, without dialing.) Hello! Vegas? Yeah, we would like some more alcohol, and yknow what else? We would like some more beers. Hello? Ohh, I
125、forgot to dial!(They both start laughing. Theres a knock on the door.)Ross: That must be our alcohol and beers! (Gets up to answer it.) Joey: Hey!Ross: Ohh, its Joey! I love Joey! (Hugs him.)Rachel: Ohh, I love Joey! Joey lives with a duck! (Goes and hugs Joey.)Joey: Hi!Rachel: Hey!Joey: Look-look-l
126、ook you guys, I need some help! Okay? Someone is going to have to convince my hand twin to cooperate!Ross: Ill do it. Hey, whatever you need me to do, Im your man. (He starts to sit down on the bed. Theres one problem though, hes about two feet to the left of it. Needless to say, he misses and falls
127、 on his butt.) (Looking up at Joey.) Whoa-oh-whoa! Are you, are you okay?Joey: Yeah! Im fine! Thanks! (He starts to leave, but gets an idea and stops.) Hey Rach, how you doin?Rachel: Im doin good, baby. How you doin?Joey: Ross, dont let her drink anymore! (Exits)Ross: Ohh, heres that Macadamia nut!R
128、achel: Ohhh!Ross: (he puts it in his mouth) Nope! Something else. (Throws it back under the bed.)Rachel: Oops! All right, so what do you want to do now?Ross: I wanna get out of the room! Yknow, II really miss downstairs.Rachel: Okay, yknow what? Theres only one way Im leaving this hotel room.Cut to
129、the casino, a very drunk and doodled on Rachel is walking arm in arm with an equally drunk and doodled on Ross are walking through the casino and greeting people on their way through. Ross has some whiskers and his nose colored in, along with his name on his forehead. Ross: Well hello! Im Ross!Rache
130、l: Good luck to ya!Ross: Excuse me sir, youve got a little something right here. (He points to the corner of his mouth and they both laugh.)(Theyve made their way to the statue of the naked man that Chandler was leaning against earlier.)Rachel: Wow!Ross: (bowing) Hello!Rachel: (bowing) Hello!Ross an
131、d Rachel: (bowing) Hello!(They both continue on and Ross meows like a cat.)Scene: The slot machines, we see some guy not having any luck. Both Phoebe and the Lurker are lurking him and each stick their heads around the corner at different times This is all set to that Pink Panther song. Finally the
132、guy gives up and walks past the lurkers position, thus giving her the advantage. She scurries in and quickly drops a coin in the slot before Phoebe gets there. Phoebe arrives slightly later and pulls the arm just after the lurker deposits the coin and wins.Phoebe: I won! I won! I finally won!The Lur
133、ker: I won! That was my quarter!Phoebe: Fine! Here! Take a hike toots! (Gives back her quarter.)(The security guard approaches.)The Lurker: (to the guard) Excuse me, sir! This lady played my quarter, this is my money. (Motions to the jackpot.)The Security Guard: (To Phoebe) Is that true miss?Phoebe:
134、 (quietly) Sells drugs to kids.The Security Guard: What?!Phoebe: She sells drugs to kids. (The guard looks at the lurker.)The Lurker: It was my quarter!The Security Guard: (To Phoebe) Was it her quarter?Phoebe: How about we talk about this over dinner?The Security Guard: Okay lady, youre out of here
135、.Phoebe: No! No, you cant arrest me! No! I wont go back! I wont go back to that hell hole!The Security Guard: Im just taking you outside!Phoebe: Oh, okay. (Walks out.)Scene: The Gift Shop, Monica and Chandler are entering.Monica: Okay, come on, I cant get married until I get something old, something
136、 new, something borrowed, and something blue.Chandler: Okay, all right, all right, all right! Okay! (Picks up a blue sweater.) Okay, heres something, heres something blue and new.Monica: Youre so efficient. I love you! Chandler: Lets go! (Starts to leave.)Monica: No-no-no! We need something old!Chan
137、dler: Ohh, great, I have condom in my wallet Ive had since I was twelve.Monica: Thatll work!Chandler: I dont think so.Monica: Okay, now we just need something borrowed!Chandler: (looks around) Here justtake this. (Hands her the sweater.)Monica: Thats stealing!Chandler: No, well-well bring it back! J
138、ust put it under your dress.(She does so and it makes her look pregnant.)Monica: Ohh. (Rubs her fake stomach.)Chandler: Okay, one thing at a time. (They run out to get married.)Scene: A blackjack table, Joey is moving in to try and get his hand twin (whos dealing) to join him in his evil plot to rul
139、e the world! Join me, and together well rule the universe as father and son! (Sorry, I had a little Star Wars creep in thereOoh, I have a big spoiler for The Phantom Menace, Yoda lives at the end! Ha-ha, spoiled it! Now you dont have to see it!)Joey: (sitting down) Ahhh! (Slides his hands across the
140、 table.)Joeys Hand Twin: Are you gonna play?Joey: No-no, I dont really have any money. Not yet, anyway (Shakes his hands.)Joeys Hand Twin: You cant sit here if youre not gonna play.Joey: (throws down a small wad of money, and as his hand twin starts to unfold it, Joey once again brings attention to
141、their special gift to the world. Yknow, looking at it now, they really dont have that similar of hands. Joeys are bigger.) Ooh-ho-ho! (The dealer stares at him and he stops.)Phoebe: (entering and sitting down at the table.) Hello. My name is Regina Phalange. Im a businesswoman in town on business. W
142、ould you like to see my card? (Looks down) Ooh, what did I do with my file-a-facts? I mustve left it in conference room B.Joeys Hand Twin: (To Joey) 14.Joey: Hit me! (He does so.)Phoebe: Oh my God! May I just say that you two gentlemen have the exact same hands! Theyre identical! Now, Ive never seen
143、 anything like that in the business world.Joeys Hand Twin: Stop it!Joey: Uhh, Ms. Phalange, may I ask you a question as an impartial person at-at this table?Joeys Hand Twin: Please stop it!Joey: Wouldnt you pay good money to see these identical hands showcased in some type of a uh, entertainment ven
144、ue?Joeys Hand Twin: (To Joey) If you leave now, I will chop off my hand and give it too you!(The security guard from before approaches and Phoebe tries to turn her back on him.) The Security Guard: (To Phoebe) Didnt I just throw you out of here?Phoebe: No, you threw out Phoebe. Im Ms. Regina Phalang
145、e. Phalange!The Security Guard: Come on, lady! (Starts to escort her out.)Joeys Hand Twin: Please, please take him too. (Motions to Joey.)Joey: Me?! Oh come on, man! You cant do this! Come on! (Being dragged out by the guard) Im your hand twin!Scene: A Little White Chapel, Chandler and Monica are en
146、tering.Chandler: Hello! One marriage please!Monica: Yep, we wanna get married! The Attendant: Well, theres a service in progress. Have a seat.Chandler and Monica: All right.(They both sit down.)Chandler: (singing) Dum! Dum-dum-dum! Dum! Dum! Dum! Dum-dum-dum!Monica: What are you doing?Chandler: Oh,
147、thats The Wedding March. Does, does that freak you out?Monica: No, only because thats the graduation song.(The real Wedding March begins playing from behind the closed doors of the chapel.)Chandler: Okay! (Stands up) This is it! (Claps his hands) Were gonna get married!Monica: Are you sure you wanna
148、 do this?(Suddenly the doors burst open, and ROSS AND RACHEL COME OUT ARM-IN-ARM! And Rachels carrying a bouquet! THEY GOT MARRIED!)Ross: Well, hello, Mrs. Ross! (Throws some rice.)Rachel: Well, hello, Mr. Rachel! (Throws some more rice.)(They storm out into the street.)Rachel: Wait! (Gets her beari
149、ngs) Okay!(She goes one way; he goes the other. The camera pans back to Chandler and Monica, and needless to say, theyre standing there dumbstruck as The Kings (Elvis Presley to the yougins) Viva, Las Vegas begins to play. Sing along with me now, Viva! Las Vegas! Vivaaaaaa! Vivaaaaa! Las Vegassssss!
150、 Fade to Black.)Ending CreditsThats all folks, no teaser; just the big cliffhanger for season 6. Yes, there will be a season 6, and itll start again in September. Have a good summer everyone!523 拉斯维加斯之旅（上集） 524 拉斯维加斯之旅（下集）菲比？能接一下吗？为什么? 就因为你懒得连屁股都不愿意挪一下?不！不！这是因为我最想与之说话的人已经在我眼前了.那好吧!马屁精!喂?嘿，乔伊!嘿 菲比!听着
151、, 你可以帮我个忙吗?我忘记了我提款卡的密码,你能帮我找一下吗?没问题! 在哪里?呃，被街角的提款机吞掉了.噢！原来你就是5639?!(5639即是电话拨号盘上的joey)是啦！谢谢你 菲比!嘿!噢, 你要和钱德说话吗?乔伊吗?! 让我跟他说!不! 因为他不相信我的电影!但那千真万确! 真的!嘿! 崔比昂尼! 回去工作啦!休息时间结束了!那是谁啊?呃, 是我的替身.还有,他现在有点太熟悉我的脾气了.你看，我整个星期都在试着向他道歉!如果他还不让我在电话里说,我就要去找他当面说清楚.呃，菲比,我听到了。可以让我跟他说吗?好啊!嘿!- 别到这来!不-不-不-不, 我百分百支持你，我想当面证实给你看
152、!我知道了! 我原谅你!但不要到这儿来!原谅我? 你一个星期都不和我说电话啊!我已经完全忘了这事了.好哥们!不要来!可以和我们照个相吗?呃，那是什么?呃, 欢乐今宵.那，就这样, 记住别过来. 好吧.莫尼卡! 不好意思我迟到了!莫尼卡?菲比?噢，菲比, 不好意思.你已经等了很久了吗?没关系啦.你搞什么鬼这么慢啊?你不可以告诉钱德啊. 好吗?刚刚我碰见了Richard.哪个Richard?那个Richard啊.Richard.Simmons?! 噢，天那!不是啊! 我的前男友!你认识他的啊，高个，有胡子的?喔! 知道了, 那让我好接受多了.见面感觉怎样?挺好的.我们聊了聊，后来，我，我和他去了吃
153、午饭.奇怪了! 我发过一个梦梦到你和Richard去吃午饭了.真的？只不过是,Richard.Simmon.继续.奇怪的是, 他人很好,呃 看起来也帅,但我对他一点感觉都没有!噢! 那为什么不能告诉钱德?因为那会让他发疯的明天就是我们周年纪念日.我不想出岔子.哦，我无法相信你们好了一年了!哇！我欠瑞秋20块了!什么?那是完全不相干的打赌.嘿!快到我们周年纪念日了!我知道.你能相信吗? 一年前我只是你的损友钱德.喔! 你现在也还是我的损友钱德.呵.我给你买礼物了！噢，但还没到日子呢!我知道，但你一定要今天打开它!好.好啦! 我来!这是两张去拉斯维加斯的机票!哇!这个周末!噢，天啊, 太完美了,我
154、们可以去探乔伊班 还可以在飞机上庆祝我们的周年纪念日.我们可以称它为“飞机纪念日”.非得这样叫吗?不是啊.这个很棒,但乔伊说过不想我们去他那里呢.噢，他只是不想麻烦我们想想我们出现后他会多么兴奋啊!加上我们还有“周年-维加斯-日”啊!和“内华达纪念日”!我想我们应该和其他人说一下.但我们可以去,是吗?是的.太好了!这是个好主意.好, 我也要去!你知道吗，菲比,这是我们的周年纪念日啊.哦 拜托,你不会再一次抛下我吧像伦敦的那次一样.抛下你?菲比,你那时怀着三个婴儿啊!呃呃，很棒的借口!我要去!嗨!嘿!嘿，你们, 听着,这周末我们将要一起去拉斯维加斯让乔伊吃一惊!包括我!你也去?!我想我可以请两天
155、假.你肯定能请两天假的，因为这次旅行我也去!哦 不 , 等等 , 等等,我明天一定要到发表会去。我不可以缺席的。哦, 我也已经得到梵高画展的票了!我等了快一年了。艺术爱好者!你说什么?我说艺术爱好者.这是一种羞辱吗?我不知道，我很累.那阿秋, 我们可以星期六一起飞过去.听来不错嘛.是吗? 我打电话给航空公司.好. 那也不错,我可以在公寓里独处一夜.噢 是啊, 那你就可以光着在屋子里转一转了.不会! 我只是独处而已.有点自己的时间.赤裸的独处时间.不! 菲比，我一人呆着不代表我会脱光光到处走.就好象, 你一人的时候,你也不会光着到处跑吧.哈-哈! 你以为我为什么经常这么久才能应门啊?那，那这次去
156、维加斯、和去伦敦那次相比哪一次比较好呢？到目前为止都差不多 菲比.ok, 那我给你这些糖果以后呢?恩，我现在觉得这次要好一点了.啊哈! 好，拉斯维加斯，1分，伦敦 0分!我马上回来.“飞机纪念日”快乐.噢! 我爱你!我现在能送你一个礼物?好!好啊!哦! 我不会做这种事吧!我喜欢你假装我忘记了礼物!那你对真实的我真的忘记了礼物，请原谅我怎么看?噢 没关系啦. 不用担心,你可以回去以后再给我啊.噢，这是我们周年日发生的最坏的事了!噢好啊! 你终于决定告诉他Richard的事了吗.什-什么Richard的事啊?噢 不.什么Richard的事啊?Simmon! 用Simmon来挡一下!好啦, 我呃,我
157、昨天偶然遇见Richard他问我是否愿意去吃顿饭.我不告诉你的唯一理由是因为我知道你会发飙而我不想破坏我们的周年纪念。我没有发脾气.真的?!噢 是啊!只是你-你碰巧遇到理查!而且你们吃了顿饭!没什么大不了嘛.太好了!好，伦敦 1分噢!看看发生什么了!呵，你看我!我在厨房里还是赤裸的!我拿起一个橙.我是赤裸的!点起蜡烛赤裸的,还要小心的.噢，天啊! 瑞秋赤裸着!我不能看那边! 我在看书啊.好了, 生动的颜色,有表现力的笔触可能她想给我看。她知道我在家里啊。她知道我能看见她啊.她在玩什么把戏啊?我想今晚有人觉得孤独了.噢-不, 盖勒博士! 停止!你是个傻瓜啊!或者 我是呢?Love to love
158、 ya baby! Ow!Love to love ya baby! Ow!Love to love ya, baby! Ow!可恶!嘿.我可以进来吗?呃 可以啊 随便.那你想我进来吗.?是啊,当然?我也这样想.好了 瑞秋,我得有言在先声明一些基本原则.只是今晚而已.如果这会成为我们的问题我就不要干了好了? 我只想知道怎么样!呃，什么怎么样 罗斯？爱的肉体表现.什么?! 你疯了吗?哦 那么-你刚刚不是在引诱我吗?用你的.裸体?噢，天啊，你看到了?! 噢!你不是在用你的裸体引诱我.没有!不是!你以为, 你真的以为我想要与你“嘿咻”?! !没有! 没有!没有!不-不-不-不.噢-哇! 不好意思,但
159、罗斯 你踢飞了你的鞋!你能，你能当一切都没有发生过吗?当然, 绝对! 你没错，对不起.谢谢.没事.好了，我想我要去收拾行李了.好.噢，等等! 还有一件事,那个关于“我们”的问题还有必要解决吗？等等啊你们!这里比伦敦要好的多! 行了吗?那个穿的挺时髦的女孩给了我一张折扣券0.99元的牛排和龙虾晚餐。菲比，你不吃肉的.9毛9这么便宜，我可以吃掉你.我可以完全适应这里，这里有我想要的一切,包括乔伊! 看!噢! 看! 嗨!哦，天啊.嘿! 乔伊!嘿! 嘿! 喔!嗨!我爱你的套儿.你们在这里干嘛?我记得叫你们不要来了嘛.你干嘛穿的象角斗士一样?呃 因为我演角斗士啊.没错, 我 呃, 我演决斗士.你看? 等
160、等.可以停一下吗? 是啊我有朋友在啊,我要稍微暂停一下.你和谁说话啊?他们.导演.呃，她好了好了, 这不是角斗士电影.我在这里工作.为什么?! 出了什么事吗?!电影停拍了因为资金不足,所以我在这里工作直到重新开拍,如果可能的话.我们替你难过.很抱歉我没告诉你，对不起，我很抱歉.没有, 没关系的, 显然我们没有必要和所有人分享一切.我就知道你还是有心病.你是角斗士啊! 哇!是，怎么了他们?莫尼卡和Richard一起吃饭了.Dawson?!不是!但那会很正点呢!不是! 他的男友Richard!那对我没意义! 知道吗?我们这么久了, 你怎么还不相信我?当你和一个猥琐的小胡子出去吃饭还要隐瞒我的时候!
161、我还能相信你吗？你说的对.很抱歉，我当时应该告诉你.谢谢.喔, 你们看.我爱维加斯!我保证，下一次我一定告诉你.下一次?噢，就差一点.不要有下一次! 你永远不能再见他!我不能见他?我觉得，你不能左右我的生活!很有趣, 因为我就是想那样做！你知道吗? 如果你要整晚这样的话,我真的不能再在你身边了.没关系!好! 周年纪念日快乐!喔! 喔! 你们! 拜托!别这样! 别这样!这明显是一个误会.这不是误会!你在说什么啊嘿-嘿!不要瞪着我！我只是在这里工作而已!呃, 罗斯?我-我很热, 所以我要脱下我的毛衣.现在, 我先告诉你这不是肉体的爱的挑逗.好笑对不起. 够了. 够了.你要知道, 昨晚对你来说也应该
162、很糗才对.不会，不会.你已经看过我的裸体好几百次了.呃-呵. 但在我们的房间以外是头一回.好了. 是哦，没错! 但你知道，我没有这么容易觉得尴尬的.什么?! 你根本就是尴尬!我不会! 罗斯, 我不象你想的这么多.是这样吗?是啊.嘿 女士! 我不管你多么想要! 好吗?!我是不会在洗手间里和你做爱的!嘿，你知道吗？在罗马时代这不仅仅是一顶帽子哦.真的?是啊! 真的!他们 他们会用它来刮地板!他们用它来刮鞋子上的泥.有时马的下面会脏，那他们就这样.乔伊, 我呃!我无法相信这是我过周年纪念的方式.好, 我带你去个好地方吧.看! 有个人给了我一百块小费.喔!是啊，他玩21点一个小时左右，塑造我的上身体形
163、然后在Richard后面用棍子这样戳他!等一下!为什么我不能象那个人那样干啊?然后投资拍电影!祝你好运!钱德! 我不光靠运气，我考虑成熟了我知道.谢谢.无法相信! 这真是最差劲的一晚!这只是你和钱德关系发展的一个小挫折！没什么的他只是钱德而已.很对不起.太白痴了! 这只是一个愚蠢的争执.甚至我自己也不想再见到Richard.那就去补救吧!去找钱德!他可能在你的房间里了!告诉她你很抱歉，还有你爱他.你知道吗？也许你说的对.没错，谢谢!当然!耶! 拉斯维加斯, 冲啊!谁丢的啊?来吧，下注吧.掷骰子.加倍或没收 第一线收钱！这个,我现在回去洗手间.好的好的，继续走！好吗？罗斯! 你干嘛先生对不起.
164、我, 我想他有点喜欢你.嘿!你听过有个老师和她的学生生了个孩子?什么? 什么嗨!小姐? 我能帮你忙吗?是的，不好意思. 你们有富余的裤子吗?呃 我的朋友出了点意外.能换一百吗?换一百!祝你好运.我们来吧.13点要牌!噢 天!慢着!钱德! 你绝对不会相信的!我找到我的同手双胞胎!什么?我的同手双胞胎!什么是同手双胞胎?听起来象什么?那是和我有同一只手的家伙!难以置信! 钱德,那个人的手和我完全地一样!就-就像在一面镜子中看着我的手般!你确定你不是在镜子中看到你的手吧?你不理解这其中的意义吗?!我能忘记那部无聊的电影.我要成为百万富翁了!怎样能?看,我还没有实行这计划,但它会赚大钱的! 看啊! 同
165、手双胞胎!我想再问一次,怎样能?这里是维加斯啊!人们会付钱看有趣的东西的!好，你会付多少钱来看这只手.两次? 呵?我-我都不知道要开什么价钱了 乔.嘿，你又不支持我了?不! 不!我只是没有反应过来而已 .你看，我现在回过神来了!同手双胞胎! 这主意值一百万呢!没错.嘿!菲比!什么?我找到了我的同手双胞胎!噢,你太幸运了!嘿!莫尼卡在哪里? 你们和好了吗?没有!但是她刚刚上来了啊!那个是乔伊!我想知道她在哪里. 这太奇怪了.是了, 她或许正和Richard聊着天。你有完没完啊!你知道她和Richard吃过午饭回来的时候所说的第一事是什么吗?她对他一点感觉都没有!真的吗?没错! 现在她很难过!她真
166、的想和好! 你应该去找她一下.好的.很好.我也应该戴一下帽子了!欢迎来到拉斯维加斯.谢谢! 旅途愉快?是的. 谢谢, 旅途很好.希望你旅途愉快.哦, 这次旅行是最过瘾的一次了!我想是在那里登记入住.是啊.你好吗!噢，小孩都喜欢我.嘿!菲比!你们也来啦! 耶!嗨!什么? 你去过化妆舞会吗?让我猜猜 你扮Pancho Vila（土匪）?而你就是Bob Saget.Pancho Vila?是啊!你在说什么啊 菲比? 我没有天啊, 你画了我的脸?!嘿, 你弄湿我的裤子!喔啊, 那是什么舞会啊?罗斯, 我就这个样从飞机出来到处走!我无法 你玩的太过火了.瑞! 等等! 男厕这边走.呃!什么?这已经是第三次
167、了这个女人在我玩过的机子上赢钱了.噢, 我敢打赌她是那种人.妖怪?什么? 不-不, 跟屁虫.噢. 什么是跟屁虫?当你玩着一台机，一直赢不了钱,那跟屁虫就等着你放弃，然后杀了你?不. 他们插入然后偷取你的累积奖金.噢!你怎么会知道的?我的外婆经常这样做的.然后给我钱去跳舞上空手道课.你上空手道课?是啊，那是一种美丽的死亡游戏.这下好了, 颜色洗不掉!什么?!笔迹的颜色擦不掉了!噢 天啊! 瑞秋, 你-你-你确定吗?没有, 其实我把它洗掉了再画上去.嘿嘿嘿 你们真的来了!乔伊!太好了! 嘿-嘿!你的朋友吗? 他很辣嘛!谢谢你 老兄.嘿 我 呃, 和钱德聊过,对电影那事我感到很遗憾.不不, 不用难过
168、. 我已经不需要它了.我找到了我的同手双胞胎!你的什么?我的同手双胞胎!一个手和我一样的人!这是个金矿啊!什么?! 这种事不会给你赚钱的!好. 好, 如果你这样想，没关系!但你们就别想和我住在我的手形大厦中去了!除了你 菲比.你可以住到拇指那去.好的 宝贝，来吧!好的! 好的! 我手气正旺啊!再见了 莫.等等 钱德, 你要干嘛?!我象在干什么? 我要回家了.什么? 等等! 为什么啊?钱德! 钱德! 等等!很对不起, 我只是玩一阵而已啦!我在到处找想告诉你,如果你不想我再见Richard,我不见就是了!他对我来说一点不重要!别这样! 我是知道的!我知道他是你生命中的真爱.不再是了.真的?!真的!
169、好了? 把回家这事忘记了吧我们还是庆祝我们的周年日.袋子是空的.是的,我想要戏剧性一点，但是我讨厌收拾东西。呃，嘿. 另一个人呢?什么人?高高的, 黑头发, 手很象这个的. 知道吗?我不知道什么手,但我接班之前的那人去了洗手间.好!你好吗?我很忙.对!好的.是了，你好. 我有点问题。我用你们生产的笔画了些东西在我朋友脸上.一些胡须.过奖了.不, 她不这样想.我知道 好象怎么说好, 唔 化妆遮不了我们也用过一切方法想把它洗掉但都没有用.我们应该怎么做?是.呃-呵.是.噢! 好的.好好, 谢谢你!是的, 这是洗不掉的.什么?! 他还说了点什么?唔, 他说觉得我很风趣. 所以好了, 你看 呃,我们就
170、这样下去吧, 我们可以玩个痛快,你会把这一切忘个一干二净的.罗斯，不要! 我是不会这样子离开房间的!噢，别这样嘛! 瑞,这-这也是是太难看嘛.罗斯, 我是个人形涂鸦啊!是, 一个白痴画了你的脸不意味着你不能去玩啊!好吗? 还有, 嘿-嘿-嘿没有人会故意看你的.好吗? 这里是维加斯! 好吗!这里有成千上万的神经病!这里有成千上万的神经.没其他意思的.来嘛! 没人会注意的, 我发誓!好了, 是有些人指指点点够了, 我要 我要喝东西!噢 嘿，你知道吗,这个他们会另外收费的.管他呢?! 因为算在我头上!这次可以喝个够了!要果仁吗?呃 哇! 那些很贵呢!真的这么喜欢吃果仁，呵?不是!滚开 你这个跟屁虫!
171、走啊! 去!嘿 菲比!噢！你们和好啦!是啊，我就是不能讨厌他太久.是啊，她是不能离开我的爱活着的.噢, 去开个房间吧.我们有啦.我知道。那就用啊.噢-噢-噢, 没错了!做得对, 你很照顾这双宝贝嘛!什么?是我, 乔伊!我认识你的吗?我 乔伊啊!噢-呵, 是了 是了, 那个怪手人.好了, 我们该怎样处理这孪生的手?!不用啊?看，你和我有这样的天赋啊. 知道吗?我们一定要干点什么的.好象, 模特手表演! 呵?或者-或者表演魔术!可能连美国航空总署也会找我们呢!我要去哇！哇！哇！哇-哇!我们可以有自己的表演啊!我们可以一起鼓掌 人们会喜欢的!还有还有 我为我们作了一首歌!这是你的手!这是我的手!噢
172、等等 那是你的手!噢 等等 这是我的手!不错啊.你还没听到和声部分!噢天啊, 我越看越象我的姨婆, Muriel.好了，你看 我们不需要下去的!我们可以把维加斯带上来!来吧来吧,我们玩21点，开始.13点.要牌!噢 23点.在我们这个赌场里!你这样是赢了10块的!我下了20块的赌注啊.没错!给钱钱买一双新鞋!好!好!我从没见过这么好的一掷!没错宝贝! 好了，我要多少点好呢?好, 啊 唔, 啊, 8. 啊, 6?挑一个啊!你不就只会和数字打交道吗 !8, 8!谢谢!如果赢了，我们请所有人吃牛排!耶!8!好啊!我们不会请他们吃牛排吧?不会!好的! 好的，这次要猜什么呢?啊,噢,再试试8.什么?两个
173、4.好的.8!不要放弃她! 你是个幸运的人!谢谢, 醉赌鬼先生!好了, 你这次掷中的话,我们就包下最大的房间!等等-等等!是我们包下最大的房间.好的, 这里最大的房间. 来吧!好! 我爱你! 我甚至忘记了我们刚才为什么要吵了!噢, 那是因为我和Rich去吃饭了我也忘记了!好了，这次我们猜多少呢?向难度挑战，8点吧.难度?!应该说 一点难度都没有!好吧好吧, 不如这样.你再掷一个8点;那我们今晚就在这里结婚.上啊! 来吧! 掷吧! 掷-掷!住口!这次赌大了！你刚说什么?你在掷一个8点，我们今晚就在这里结婚.你不是开玩笑吧?!当然啦! 我爱你!我从来没有如此的爱过一个人.我也没有象爱你这般爱过其他
174、人.好, 那如果投出8点来，就当是一种预兆，我们结婚!你认为呢?好!好! 来吧! 来吧! 没错!好吧! 有一个4! 另外-另外一个呢?在桌子底下.都不许动!这样, 你看这边; 我来看这边!好的!在这里! 在这里!这可以当4，也可以当5.你决定吧.这是一个4.我也是这么想.噢, 又输光了.是这样了! 你和我, 出去单挑!我不想看到你的金发被扯掉一块!冷静点!好了女士, 你的跟屁虫生涯要结束了!什么?!没错, 从现在开始你要跟着谁,我会比你先一步跟上他!你要盯上另一个,我都会在你前头先到,无论何时!我会无时无刻的跟在你后面,直到星期一因为我那天我回家.你什么时候走?也是星期一.什么时间?或许我们可
175、以一起坐车走!要牌. 要牌.我们牌不够了.没错, 我们还要 呃, 喝的.先等一下.喔, 好.喂! 维加斯吗?是啊, 我们还要一点酒,还有?我们还要一些啤酒.喂? 噢, 我忘记拨号了!一定是我们的酒和啤酒来了!嘿!噢，是乔伊! 我爱乔伊啊!噢, 我爱乔伊!乔伊和鸭子一起住呢!嗨!嘿!你们看-看,我需要你们帮助! 行吗?你们要去说服我的同手双胞胎跟我合作!我去吧. 嘿, 你要我做什么,我都会两胁插刀的.喔-噢-喔! 你，你没事吧?没事! 我很好! 有心了!嘿 瑞秋, 你好吗（泡妞用语）?我很好, 宝贝. 你好吗?罗斯, 不要让她再喝酒了!噢, 有颗果仁啊!原来不是! 是其他东西来的.好了, 现在要
176、干什么好呢?我想要离开这个房间! 你知道吗 我我很想到楼下啊.好吧你知道吗?只有一个方法可以让我离开这里.好吗!我是罗斯!祝你好运!先生, 你这里有点东西.喔!你好!你好!你好!我赢了! 我赢了! 我终于赢了!是我赢了! 那是我的币!好! 这个给你! 一边去!对不起 先生! 这个女人用了我的币,这是我的钱.真是这样吗?卖毒品给小孩.什么?!她卖毒品给小孩啊.这是我的币!这是她的币吗?不如我们吃晚饭的时候才说这个吧?好了，女士, 你要出去.不要! 不要, 你不能拘捕我! 不要!我不要回去!我不要回到那个鬼洞穴!我只是要带你出去!噢，好吧.好了，来吧, 我要拿到一件旧的，一件新的，一件向人借的，一
177、件蓝色的东西才可以结婚。好, 好了，好了这里有了, 这是蓝色的和新的.你做事真利索. 我爱你!- 我们走吧!- 不-不-不!我还要一些旧的东西!哦，有了, 我钱包里有个从十二岁就藏起的避孕套.可以用啊!我可不肯定啊.好了, 我们就差一些向人借的东西了!这个，就拿这个.这是偷窃!不, 我们会还回来的嘛!快把它藏到衣服下面去.噢.好了，一步一步来.你要玩吗?不-不, 其实我没钱的.暂时，还没有你不玩的话不能坐到这里来的.你好.我叫Regina Phalange.我是一个女商人.你要我的名片吗?噢, 我的公文包在哪里呢?我一定是忘在B会议室了.14要牌!噢天啊! 我才发现你们两个人的手居然一模一样!
178、真是一样的!我在商界上从未见过这样的事.够了!呃Phalange小姐,我可以问你一个私人的问题吗?不要再说了!你会花很多钱看这同手表演吗,比如在一些娱乐的场所?如过你现在走,我可以把我的手剁下来给你!我刚刚不是把你赶走了吗?不是，你赶走了菲比.但我是Regina Phalange. Phalange!来吧，女士!拜托，把他也带走吧.我?! 噢别这样了, 老兄!你不可以这样做! 不要!我是你的同手双胞胎啊!你好! 我要结婚!是的, 我们要结婚了!好, 还有一对在前面.坐一下吧.好的.你在干什么?噢 那是婚礼进行曲啊.你不喜欢吗?不是，因为那好象是毕业歌.好了! 到我们了!我们要结婚了!你决定了要这样做吗?你好吗, 罗斯夫人!你好吗, 瑞秋先生!等等! 好了!
