1、三月，行军1.What day of the week is the best for having fried foods?3.What is the smallest room in the world?2.What month do soldiers hate?1.Policeman:You cant park here.Driver:Why cant I?Policeman:Read the sigh there.Driver:It says,“Fine for Parking,”so I parked.Enjoy some verbal jokes:罚款2.Girl:If we ma
2、rry,will you give me a ring?Boy:Of course.Whats your telephone number?3.Daughter:Auntie kissed me this morning,Mum!Mum:How nice!Did you kiss her back,dear?Daughter:Of course not.I kissed her face.Read some of these customer and waiter jokes and match the joke.Can you match the joke with the explanat
3、ion.1.C:Whats that fly doing in my soup?W:Swimming.I think!(B)The first person is angry about something and wants to say“Why is this here?”zxxk2.C:Whats that?W:Its bean soup.C:I dont want to know what its been.I want to know what it is now.(C)The answer to the question contains a word which,when spo
4、ken,can have two meanings.The first person is asking for information about time.The second person treats it as a question about shape.The second person treats it as a request for information,and gives an answer to the question.3.C:Waiter.Will the pancakes be long?W:No,sir.Round.(A)Patient:Doctor.Ive
5、 lost my memory.Doctor:When did this happen?Patient:When did what happen?Anisha:Thank you doctor.My fever is gone.Doctor:Dont thank me.Thank god.Anisha:Then Ill pay the fees to god.Little Johnny feels sorry for teacherA new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology(哲学)courses.She started up h
6、er class by saying“Everyone who thinks youre stupid,stand up!”After a few seconds,Little Johnny stood up.The teacher said,“Do you think youre stupid,Little Johnny?”“No,maam,but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!1.A big black bug bit a big black dog on his big black nose!2.2.Fresh frie
7、d fish,Fish fresh fried,Fried fish fresh,Fish fried fresh.3.3.While we were walking,we were watching window washers wash Washingtons windows with warm washing water.A tongue twister competitionplay on wordstongue twister饶口令jokesPun双关Riddle谜语 limerick1.How did Watson answer Holmes question?-I think o
8、f how short life is and how long the universe lasted.-I think of how small I am and how vast the sky is.Zx.xk-I think of how cold the universe is and how warm people can be in their beds.2.What happened actually?Someone has stolen their tent.After reading the funny story,what kinds of persons do you
9、 think they are?Sherlock Holmes:Doctor Watson:carefulcarelessYou are going to listen to a funny story about jam.Before you listen,look at the exercises below.Try and predict the story.Tell your partner what you think will happen.Listen to Part 1 and write down the main idea.Mary made some jam but le
10、ft some on the kitchen table for a few days as she had to go to look after her sick mother.Some days later,John,knowing nothing about the jam,came home and threw it into the chicken yard.Listen to Part 1 again and answer these questions.1.What was Mary going to do with the cooked plums in the pan?Sh
11、e was going to put them in the fridge later when they had cooled down.2.What did John think Mary should have done with the mess in the pan?He thought she should have thrown it out for the chickens to eat.Marys reactionJohns reaction to herMary will laugh1 John will apologize.2 He will tell her she s
12、hould not have left the jam on the kitchen table.Try to guess Mary and Johns reaction.Marys reactionJohns reaction to herMary will get angry and tell John he should have put the jam in the dustbin.1 John will get angry too and say that she should have told him she was making jam.2 He will laugh and
13、say it is not important.3 He will apologize.Marys reactionJohns reaction to herMary will say that the problems with the chickens are Johns responsibility1 John will deny this saying that she should not have left the jam on the kitchen table.2 He will say that Mary did not tell him what she had been
14、doing in the kitchen.3 He did not know the chickens would get sick.Mary got angry with John.Mary saw the chickens behaving strangely.John was sorry.The chickens enjoyed the jam.John said he thought the jam was porridge.Mary looked at the red mess on the ground.John said the chicken were drunk.Mary came home.Listen to Part 2 and put these sentences in order.13652748Fill in the blanks.“You _ my jam,”she shouted.“Oh,_ what it was,”he said.“Im _ but I thought it was _ which had gone bad in the hot weather.The chickens have _ the jam,but its made them _.”threw awaythatssorryporridgeenjoyeddrunk
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