1、Hello, 6-year-old child 交朋友从你垂垂欲落泪，呜咽如有声的表情来看，咱们的谈话该结束了。我会让你回去继续点点戳戳，继续东动西动，继续玩闹，继续撕机上杂志玩。我还会待在自己的座位上，幻想将自己这没有小孩的成年人的身体冲出飞机，畅游天空。提米，享受接下来的飞行吧。坐在你身边，我真的很喜欢。交新朋友真是有趣啊。Hello, 6-year-old child.Seeing as how fate has brought us together here, in the crowded coach section of this expensive airplane, I tho
2、ught I should introduce myself.My name is Amy, and Im an adult. I suspect that youre too young to understand what “adult” means, so let me explain. It means that Im taller than you, and smarter, and that I get to do lots of awesome things, like smoke cigarettes and ovulate. It also means that I like
3、 to take naps on airplanes and read my newspaper in silence. These things seem to be very different from the things that you like to do.Ive gleaned from its near-constant utterance by the woman sitting next to youyour mother, I suppose, or perhaps a social worker or a federal prisoner whos being pai
4、d to spend time with youthat your name is Timmy. Its probably Timothy, actually, but people call you Timmy because its cuter. Which is appropriate, Timmy, because youre very cute, you really are. Im going to drink this cup of coffeewould you like some? I didnt think so. Youre more of a juice-box man
5、, from what I gather. The way I gather this is by looking at the stain on my ninety-eight-dollar pants, the one you made when you put your juice box there. If I touched your pants, Timmy, I would probably be sent to jail. There are lots of differences between you and me, but thats one of the big one
6、s: the quality and the seriousness of what happens when we touch other peoples pants.Youre not much of a sleeper, are you, Timmy? Weve just met, but it seems to me like maybe you dont really enjoy sleeping all that much. In fact, it seems to me that one of your greatest joys in life is wakefulnessan
7、d not simply passive wakefulness but the kind of vigorous wakefulness that makes a person like me start to question the very possibility of silence as a condition that can exist in the universe. I can see that Ive confused you, Timmy, and I apologize; I was only trying to point out that you really s
8、eem to enjoy being awake. Let me make it up to you by giving you this modest dose of Ambien. Its a kind of candy for your soul. Your soul is a kind of mouth thats inside your brain.Here comes the nice stewardess lady with a bag for collecting peoples garbage. Would you like me to give her some of th
9、e garbage thats strewn all over your seatand, if were being perfectly honest here, Timmy, all over my seat as well? And, while were at it, maybe I could give her this talking dollthe one that sings songs, very loud songs, songs of terrifying and ungodly volume, from that animated movie about adventu
10、rous insects. Its not that I dont love the doll; its just that Im pretty sure its illegal for children to carry such things on airplanes. Have you heard of terrorism, Timothy? Thats why its illegal for you to have this doll.Your whimpering and your dripping facial parts suggest that perhaps this con
11、versation has run its course, so Ill let you get back to your finger painting, your fidgeting, and your wanton, inexplicable shredding of the in-flight magazine. Ill be here in my seat, fantasizing about hurtling my childless adult body out of the airplane and into the sky. Enjoy the rest of the flight, Timmy. Ive really enjoyed sitting next to you. Its fun to make new friends.版权所有：高考资源网()版权所有：高考资源网()